some days are good...

...and some are bad.

Today was one of the bad ones. My stomach hurt, my head hurt, I just overall felt bad.
Lately, one of my frustrations has been that I am not in control. Before about a month and a half ago, everything felt ok. And then it started with the doctors, and then the boyfriend/ex, and then more doctors, and then a car wreck, and then medicine, and the frustrations of living in house that is hard for me to be in at times, and more medicine, and now, I am still waiting....on medicine of course. This whole time I have been beaten down. I hate feeling sick and being on medicine, but I know it is necessary. I hate being away from home. I hate that school, the one thing that I feel like I can give up on for a while, has become my only escape.

I feel weak. I am weak. I have been made weak. I dont know why. But I know that with time, my Jesus will show me why. ..."My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" 2 Corinthians 12:9

I know that bad days will happen. I know that there are days where my weakness will be the only thing I can think about. But I am ok with that. Because on those days, Jesus steps in. He makes up for what I lack. He takes care of me. He is the only doctor that matters and His medicine is the greatest.

I love my Jesus more than ever. Through my broken-ness (word?) He has pulled me so close to him and shown me that things will be ok.... He has taught me lessons that are hard to learn....
And he is still teaching me.